May 18, 2009

I’ve encountered by first huge problem as a director/executive producer. Someone I was relying on to be a huge part of my movie quit on me. I have refused to let this situation stop us, but it’s disheartening.

It’s disheartening because it was a friend and I know her reasons behind it are completely and utterly askew. She’s been going through a bad patch recently and she is letting life beat her, believing that everyone else on my crew is out to attack her instead of believing what we were actually doing which was extending an additional opportunity to her that she didn’t have access to. As a result she’s completely shut down, shut me out and I fear that I’ve not only lost a creative partner, but possibly a friend. I can hope that she will come to her senses but as someone that knows her well, I do not see that happening.

What this situation has proven to me is that God is constantly faithful, and that he has given me the personal ability to pull through this and still see the end game, but also the right people. The remaining people on my team have stepped up, pushed through and are dead set on making sure this set back does not actually set us behind. I know that things will get done and possibly, my movie and my fortitude as a director will be better for it.

I hope my friend will pull through this, but I have to wonder that if she’d shut me out so completely like this, if we were really ever as close as I thought we were. She remains in my prayers, but my film can continue on without her.